I once wrote about moving to Chicago, for ShinyGun magazine. The motto of the site is “you never quite lose that feeling of starting out.” Sometimes I do lose that feeling. I can find people to talk to in a party full of strangers. I can make snappy and correct decisions at work. I can come home and cook something from rice, vegetables and tofu. Other days… other days I wonder how I’ll afford peanut butter sandwiches this week, think about ditching Chicago for another adventure that’ll probably involve an air mattress, and hope nothing goes so wrong that it can’t be fixed.