A phrase

The phrase, “honor your reasons” keeps popping into my head, some kind of self-help slogan that materialized out of nowhere. I’ve been questioning my decisions, wondering why this is the path in the yellow wood. Starting a new job means constantly trying to adjust to new information, making decisions based on limited experience and hoping people keep the faith long enough to not fire you. I remember starting at Turning the Page, where I packed half as much construction paper as we needed into the boxes of stuff for a literacy night that we were hosting. End result; fifty kids scrambling and grabbing over precious sheets of construction paper, my boss rushing around the school begging the art teacher for supplies, etc. I screwed up lots of other stuff too, on a daily basis, stuff that I can’t even recall now. Getting lost on the way to meetings, creating three times too many bookmarks, buying too few bags of frozen chicken nuggets at Costco, having no idea how to speak with teachers, standing around blinking and lost at events swarming with kids. But that’s a situation where I got better, lots better, and ended up feeling like a normal, valuable person — once I’d made a few mistakes. I’m hoping that will happen at the Neos, while I learn my way through this year.

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