One morning in the elevator last week, there was an elevator technician riding up with me and a middle-aged woman. The woman was grilling the technician about the safety of the elevators.

Technician: They’re perfectly safe.
Me: I got stuck in one once for 20 minutes.
Woman: I got stuck in one for half an hour.
Technician: But you didn’t get hurt, did you?
Woman: I was mentally traumatized.

In other building news, the place I work may need a bigger office. There’s one vacant office directly above where we are now. My boss wants to have a hole cut in the floor and build stairs. Everyone else wants a ladder and a pole. That would be the coolest thing ever.

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