lindsayliveshere.org

So NaNoWriMo is not as easy as it sounds. In fact, it doesn’t even sound easy and it’s actually harder than that. Its difficulty can be boiled down to this one unfortunate fact: words do not pour forth from my fingertips like water from a spigot. Although I do like that word: spigot. I am currently only up to 4,000-odd words, and I am one week behind schedule. That’s fine.

Sometimes I wish I had a giant granny-style handbag to slap stupid people with. Like the purses that old ladies in sitcoms have. You always see them beating the heck out of their would-be purse-snatchers. How convenient would it be to have a heavy-duty handbag, at the ready, to smack sense into people.

Spent this evening with Eliina at Standee’s, the diner down the block with the blinky flashy sign and the best people-watching scene in town. We ordered milkshakes, coffee and fries. Somehow this seemed totally normal. We played with the jukebox (though it ate one of our dollars) and thoroughly enjoyed the entire one minute and 57 seconds of “She Came In Through the Bathroom Window.” Eliina: “We should have picked a longer song.”

“You’re hanging out with musicians, painters and actors. Where are you, Paris?” — my old boss, Jason

After you vote for a leader of the free world…
Chicago folks can go to the library and vote for their favorite children’s book character. Democracy. It’s everywhere.

El driver, on a northbound Red Line train at Thorndale:

-Attention passengers. There is no southbound service at this station. You must board this northbound train and catch a southbound train at Loyola.

[Pause, a few people board.]

-Southbound passengers, hel-llllo? You must board a northbound train to Loyola and then go south.

[Pause, more people board.]

-Attention attention! Passengers on the platform waiting for a southbound train. You must board this northbound train.

[Some people remain obliviously on the southbound platform. Doors close. Train chugs forward.]

-I tried to tell ‘em.

[Entire car cracks up.]

One stop later, where I live, at Granville:

-ATTENTION PASSENGERS GOING SOUTHBOUND. THERE IS NO SOUTHBOUND SERVICE AT THIS STATION. YOU MUST GO NORTH TO LOYOLA AND CATCH A SOUTHBOUND TRAIN.

[Pause. Everyone boards except one man.]

-EXCUSE ME, SIR? YOU IN THE BLACK COAT.

[Pause.]

-SIR IN THE BLACK COAT, TALKING ON THE CELL PHONE…

[Pause.]

-SIR THERE IS NO SOUTHBOUND SERVICE AT THIS STATION. YOU MUST BOARD THIS TRAIN.

[Amanda and I exit the train. Man in the black coat keeps talking on the cell phone, obliviously. I wonder what it's like to have a public announcement aimed directly at you.]